Juxtaposition...is just what you need!
“You can’t always get what you want, but if try sometimes you might find, You get what you need.” - Keith Richards/Mick Jagger
Another hygge afternoon with my sister from another mister, Amanda. I had just pulled curbside to pick her up for our Sunday afternoon yoga/meditation class, when my phone rang. It was my dad. I always pick up when he calls. He immediately asked: “Have you spoken to your brother?” I knew exactly what he was talking about. My father went on to say that he would not be able to help me financially in March, even though February had been a particularly bad month, and I had no reason to be optimistic for the foreseeable future. My brother was in the midst of his own crisis that had trumped any myopic problems. So there it was in a two minute conversation: figure your sh*t out, because you’re on your own.
As Amanda got into the car, she could immediately sense my despair. I explained what was going on and she offered what any great friend would advise: words of encouragement. She gently reminded me, in her soft , loving way, that I inspired her. I reminded her of her mom, who forged ahead under the hardships of single motherhood. One of the things she loved most about me was my ability to persevere though anything. Her words landed with grace while tears I was trying to conceal came streaming down my face.
No sooner had I begun my descent into the vortex of despair did I see a man on the ground. Literally, on the ground. He was unable to move. He wore a rumpled flannel shirt, and his jeans, rolled up around his calf, had a faded teal hue that suggested they had seen far better days. He had come crashing down on the pavement. He and his wife were trying to situate him onto his scooter, when, in one fell swoop, his legs gave way from underneath him, and down he went. Amanda exclaimed: “Is he alright?”, and without uttering another word (as we both understood what needed to happen next), I pulled the car over to let her out so she could help. I parked the car in the closest spot available, and ran over to assist. Amanda introduced me as soon as I arrived. The man, without skipping a beat, confidently said in an unwavering voice: “Now Liz can come around the back and help lift my shoulders”. It seemed like this had happened before, and he even joked that at least he wasn’t lying in a puddle and being rained upon like the last time. I was struck by the poignancy of his humor, and it was inspiring how a person in this situation could nonetheless summon levity. Indeed he had fallen before due to his MS and his legs were no longer able to hold his body.
As the minutes went by, two men came over to assist. We finally got him up and rolling (so to speak); he graciously thanked us for all of our help. I realized in that moment that perspective and attitude are perhaps the two most important aspects of transcending what otherwise might seem to be an overwhelming and ostensibly insurmountable situation.
Recently, on three oSeccasion, to be exact, I was reminded of a Tony Robbins quote, “life doesn’t happen to you, but for you.” I am definitely taking literary license because I am not speaking verbatim. However, the sentiment remains the same. I have to look at this situation as a gift. I learned, very quickly and in my sense of despair, that A) my situation was not as dire as once believed, and B) how on earth do I describe my situation as dire. Here was a man, despite a handicap beyond his positive demeanor, had literally brought him down. He with sure will and positivity accepted his place and raised himself well above with positivity and perseverance. He never felt embarrassment or shame. He knew what he needed to do.
Sometimes it seems like the universe throws reminders at us in sudden shocking ways. I am grateful for the reminder because the juxtaposition was exactly what I needed.
What kind of unexpected reminders have you had.
Artist of Selected View by Seth Benzel sethbenzel.com